“Tell me where you lost the company of Christ, and I will tell you the most likely place to find him,” says Charles Spurgeon. He goes on to quote an old proverb . . . “Look for a thing where you dropped it, it is there.”
When I lose my awareness of Jesus in my life, I can often figure out “where I dropped it” by looking first at my journal and then at my calendar. I go back to the date of my last meaningful journal entry and then check my calendar for that day and the days following. Almost without fail, that day and the days after were incredibly busy . . . packed with meetings and things to do. Busyness is the enemy of intimacy and when I get busy, I leave Jesus behind.
Sin is another marker. Look back to the meeting or the conversation with your wife when you “spun” the truth a little (or outright lied). That’s often the place you left Jesus. He is light. Go to the dark and you’ll stay in the dark . . . at least you’ll feel like it. He’s actually still with you, sin and all, because you’re His child. But your awareness of Him can disappear until you repent and invite Him back into your soul.
Another more subtle way of losing your Jesus is to forget about the Scriptures. God inspired the Bible . . . all of it. It contains His revealed truth and describes His amazing grace. He speaks to us through His Word clearly and dependably . . . usually through His law and through His unchanging principles. Sometimes when I feel like I’ve lost my Jesus, I’ll go back to the last place I have marked in my Bible. I start reading again and before long, I’m aware of His presence. There’s something amazing about that Book!
One other option to keep in mind . . . something that seems to happen pretty rarely. There are times when God just ‘goes silent.’ The “dark night of the soul” it’s called. A time when you lose your Jesus but it’s not your fault. He just decides to be silent for a while. To go ‘stealth’ and leave you unaware of His presence.
I experienced this for the first time last summer and it was really weird. Frightening. For almost 6 weeks, I didn’t hear from God, didn’t ‘feel’ His presence, nothing. (They say St. John of the Cross, this totally dedicated saintly guy who lived in the 16th century, went 7 years without hearing from the God he’d dedicated his life to communing with.) What I learned through my brief ‘desert’ is to cling to my faith no matter what. To trust Him even when He’s silent and seems absent. I told Him repeatedly “I love you Father, I trust you Father” and kept going. Eventually . . . when His purposes were served, He was ‘there’ again. “I love you Regi.” Whew! So glad that was over.
Maybe the most important thing to know is that even when you ‘lose your Jesus,’ whether through busyness, neglect, sin, or silence, Jesus never loses you.
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake. (Deuteronomy 31:6) . . .
