Just recently, I counseled a couple regarding their troubled marriage. After 14 years, they were on the verge of a divorce. They owned a large and thriving business and had worked together to build it into a financially successful enterprise. But little by little, each had offended the other, communication was non-existent and Satan had built an invisible wall between them.
After listening to all of their shared hurts, as each pointed out the other’s fault, I asked a simple question: “When was the last time one of you apologized to the other?” There was dead silence. Finally, the wife spoke up in almost a whisper. “Never.” We never apologize over anything.” I had identified the root issue, so I pressed in.
One of you is going to have to be the first to apologize. I explained the wonderful perspective of Nicky Gumbel, founder of the Alpha Course. He says, “The first to apologize is the bravest. The first to forgive is the strongest. And the first to forget is the happiest.” I shared how Christ forgave us while we were yet sinners. He took the initiative to extend forgiveness to us.
Suddenly, to my great shock, the husband fell onto his knees and burst into tears as he took his wife by her hands and lovingly apologized and asked for her forgiveness. She too immediately broke into tears and asked for his forgiveness. A marriage saved, a family saved, a business remained intact. Sincere, heartfelt humility expressed in a simple request of, “I am sorry, will you please forgive me?”
An apology is priceless. Anybody you need to apologize to today?
