I sat in the darkened hospital room holding my son Michael after his early morning feeding. This was the day. The day we were scheduled to go home, just me and my husband, with total responsibility for a 7 lb. 2 oz. squirming bundle. What was the hospital thinking, letting me go home when it was so obvious I didn't know what I was doing? I remember thinking only one thought—I hope I don’t screw this up.
Looking back, I realize that I knew more than I thought I did. When Michael cried, I fed and changed him. When he was restless at 3 AM, we paced the hall carpet together, me stumbling sleepily in my nightgown and him gazing around wide-eyed, spitting out his pacifier as quickly as I put it in. When he didn't want to eat his vegetables, I cajoled him with the “Ooh-here-comes-the-green-bean-airplane” move.
We go way back, me and this boy of mine. This 6-foot-tall man who is now a husband and dad to two little girls of his own still melts my heart when I look at him. I didn't screw it up. He’s a grown adult who makes me so proud that I feel as if my heart will burst.
The wonder of being a mom still amazes me. One day you have no children and then one day you do. You anticipate and worry and wonder how you will ever handle it all. And then, they appear and you can’t imagine what life was like before them. As if they had always been a part of you.
God’s plan for us as moms is magnificent. It’s full of wonder and delight and a love so strong you almost can’t bear it. It’s full of sleepless nights and tantrums that set your teeth on edge, but with just one toothless smile or a single “I love you mom” the tired edge melts into sheer delight. You look at your child and with pride think, “That one’s mine. And he’s perfect.”
Exactly the way your heavenly father thinks about you.
Dear God, thank you that you love and treasure each mother.
Written by Sherry Surratt
