Long-range thinking and planning is not a strong point for the average young person—and this often sends parents spiraling into great depths of discouragement. On any given day, you may start with grand plans for transformative teaching only to be reduced to an energy-withering skirmish over something as trivial as homework assignments or unmade beds.
How do you focus your child on the thing that is ultimately the most important—his or her personal relationship with God? You do it, like eating the proverbial elephant meal, one bite at a time.
Here are three important truths you can begin to teach in the midst of life’s daily struggles:
Vision is more important than vocation
For very good reasons, parents push their children to excel in school and to work hard so that doors of opportunity will be open for future success. But teens often don’t know what they want to do with their lives … and many who think they do really don’t. At least half of all students change majors while in college. And fifty percent of college graduates will end up doing something unrelated to their major. Vocations are fluid; what’s critical is that you help your child develop a clear vision of who they are in Christ. Stress daily the importance of figuring out what God wants … in relationships, serving others, building godly character and working with integrity. These are the “cross-disciplinary” essentials needed, whether your child becomes a plumber or a PhD.
Terms and conditions apply—but not at home
At home under the parental umbrella there are plenty of freebies, ranging from cell phones to meals to occasional redemption from bad decisions. Life gets tougher for kids when they leave home and reality can be a cruel teacher. They soon learn that nothing is really free—everything is accompanied by terms and conditions and, sometimes, brutal consequences. You want them to remember, always, that there is a place where they will receive unconditional love—so model it now, while you have their attention. Remind your children regularly that there is nothing they can do to forfeit or diminish your love. In short, be a reflection of Christ’s unchangeable love.
God’s love will outlast all others
If the natural order of things plays out in your family, one day you will be gone and your children will be left to forge ahead through life without parents. Will they be ready, responsible and certain of their role in life? If you’ve helped them develop a godly vision and shown them Christ-like love, they will be well-equipped and confident in the knowledge that God’s steadfast, unending love will carry them through the rest of their days.
